


ex's and oh's

by unitedbylarry



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Alec Lightwood Deserves Nice Things, Bottom Magnus Bane, Drunk Alec Lightwood, Hurt Alec, Hurt Magnus Bane, Insecure Alec Lightwood, Insecure Magnus Bane, Jealous Alec Lightwood, Jealous Magnus Bane, M/M, Malec, Protective Alec, Protective Magnus Bane, Smut, Top Alec Lightwood, look at me learning how to tag, underhill has a crush on alec
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-11
Updated: 2019-04-11
Packaged: 2020-01-11 21:38:00
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,750
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18432590
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/unitedbylarry/pseuds/unitedbylarry
Summary: Silence fills the air again. While Alec is drinking his eighth beer, he realises that maybe he isn’t so weak after all. He can take his alcohol just fine. However, out of nowhere, angst hits him and he feels like he needs to speak or his chest will explode. Alec slams the empty bottle on the table and takes a deep breath. “It’s not fucking fair,” he says firmly, “we’re dating and yet, he thinks it’s totally fine to keep his exes’ stuff inside a box, which, by the way, he goes through everyday!” he laughs ironically. “And I am supposed to accept the fact that he thinks about other people while I’m getting ready to take him on a romantic dinner!”orThe one where Alec finds Magnus' memory box and doesn't accept that he goes through it every morning.





	ex's and oh's

**Author's Note:**

> Hiii, everyone. So, this is the first one shot that I write that has smut, so forgive me if I'm bad at it!
> 
> Anyway, if you wanna talk to me, I'm on twitter (malecinspires)!!
> 
> Anyways!!!! Let's get to what matters! I hope you like it!
> 
> Dedicated to Pri

The night is cold as Alec walks down the street and towards a bar. His mind keeps going back to that argument he and Magnus had some hours ago. Apparently his boyfriend thinks it’s okay to have a box full of memories of his exes and go through it every single day.

Well, Alec doesn’t think so.

It was a big fight. It’s not like they don’t argue from time to time, but most of the things are stupid, like Alec getting pissed because Magnus is too busy to make love, or because he wakes up alone everyday because Magnus is an early bird. But this time, no. This time the fight was big and it almost ended up with a break up. And don’t get him wrong, but Alec doesn’t think it’s okay to want to relive every memory you ever had with each one of your exes when your present boyfriend is getting ready to take you on a romantic dinner.

Magnus, as the charming man he is, tried to convince Alec that it wasn’t like that, it wasn’t because he wanted to relive the memories, but he didn’t want to forget anything through the years. Well, he tried to take Alec to bed because they always have make up sex and things turn out to be just fine after it. It ended up with Alec telling him “go fuck one of your exes” and slamming the door.

And now, Alec is walking through the streets of New York as he searches for a reasonable bar to drink something. You see, Alec is not the type of person who likes to drink for fun, but if over drinking leads you to forgetting everything and ending up with a blank mind, that’s what he needs today.

As he walks, he sees some bars full of people and he shakes his head to all of them. The less people, the better, he thinks to himself. He’s looking for drinks, not for problems. He continues until he reaches a more quiet street. There, he sees a bar that has no more than twenty people, and since he doesn’t think he’ll find anything emptier than that, he sees himself walking through the front door soon enough.

He goes straight to the bar, not even bothering to look around and see if there’s any familiar faces around him. “One beer, please,” he says to the barman, who quickly takes it and hands it to him. “Rough night?” the man asks him. Alec doesn’t say anything, only nods at him as he chug the whole bottle, soon ordering for another one.

As he drinks, he recalls all of the objects he found inside the box. Alec knows he shouldn’t have invaded Magnus’ privacy as he is totally against it and knows everyone should have their personal space, but he couldn’t help himself and before he knew, he was going through it. Inside it, Alec found plenty of random stuff, but he couldn’t figure out what any of them meant. That was until he found a picture with a writing that said “if anything will keep me safe, is this picture, close to my heart, all my love, George”. When he read it, his instinct was to let it all fall to the ground, and he soon got down on his knees to put it all back inside the box, and while he did it, he couldn’t stop but wonder if everything inside there belonged to the same person.

Alec takes a long sip of his beer and clenches his jaw at the memory. At first, he felt bad that he went through Magnus’ things without asking for his permission, but that feeling soon left his mind and the feeling of betrayal hit him instead. He couldn’t believe that Magnus was keeping George’s things inside a box when Alec was right there beside him. For him, that was similar that was cheating. It was like thinking about someone else while having sex with someone. And, after that thought, Alec’s insecureness only made him think of worse things like Magnus actually picturing someone else while Alec was fucking him.

The thought of it makes him want to throw up.

Later, he found out those objects didn't all belong to George, but apparently each of them belonged to one of Magnus' exes. And that pissed him off even more.

He orders another beer and, before he knows, he’s on the seventh. He already feels a little tipsy, but he’s never tested his limits before, and he wants to see how far he can go before he knows he can’t take it anymore. Some minutes later, Alec’s phone vibrates and it’s Magnus, “where are you?”, it reads. He bites his bottom lip as he wonders if he should reply him or not. Before he can actually make a decision, someone approaches him and calls his name. “Alec,” the familiar voice says. Alec puts his phone on the table and turns his head. 

It’s Underhill. 

Alec smiles at him, “hey, man,” he says before taking a sip of his drink. “What are you doing alone here?” Underhill asks, as he turns to order two beers when he realises Alec’s is almost over. Alec shrugs and licks his lips. “What are you doing here?” Alec asks back. “Can’t a man have a drink after fulfilling his duty?” The blonde raises his eyebrows, smiling at him. 

When the barman comes back with the two beers he opens both and puts them on the table. “Thanks,” Underhill smirks at the man, who leaves, blushing. He slides one of the drinks to Alec, who thanks him with a nod.

Both of them stay quiet for a while. Even if Alec tries, he can’t get Magnus and the argument out of his head. He can’t help the feeling that they need to talk, that things aren’t fine. Not being fine with the warlock makes him want to scream.

“So, where’s Magnus?” Underhill interrupts his thoughts as he takes a sip of his beer, eyes locked to Alec’s. “Home, I guess,” he answers, shrugging. “Are you two okay?” he asks him, furrowing his eyebrows. “We had an argument, but things will be fine,” Alec clenches his jaw, “I hope,” he whispers.

Silence fills the air again. While Alec is drinking his eighth beer, he realises that maybe he isn’t so weak after all. He can take his alcohol just fine. However, out of nowhere, angst hits him and he feels like he needs to speak or his chest will explode. Alec slams the empty bottle on the table and takes a deep breath. “It’s not fucking fair,” he says firmly, “we’re dating and yet, he thinks it’s totally fine to keep his exes’ stuff inside a box, which, by the way, he goes through everyday!” he laughs ironically. “And I am supposed to accept the fact that he thinks about other people while I’m getting ready to take him on a romantic dinner!”.

Underhill’s eyebrows are raised and he blinks a couple of times like he was not expecting this at all. “Okay…” he says quietly. “Continue”.

“It’s not okay!” Alec exclaims louder. “He doesn’t have the right to tell me how I should or should not feel. He told me I was acting like a child, but I can’t understand what’s childish about me being jealous and not accepting that he still think about other people while dating me!” he bites his bottom lip so hard he can taste the blood. “I hate to be fighting with him, but this is not okay, no matter how many times he tries to convince me it is”.

Underhill reaches for Alec’s hand that’s resting on the table. “Alec, you have the right not to like it,” he tells him, “don’t feel bad for not liking it, if it was my boyfriend I wouldn’t like it,” he continues. Alec takes a deep breath as he moves his hand away and rests it on his thigh. “I need more beer,” Alec ignores Underhill. “I’ll get that for us,” the blonde tells him as he stands up and walks to the bar.

Alec feels his eyes and throat burning, like he might cry any second from how angry he is. He wants to call Magnus and tell him that if it was him doing that, he wouldn’t like it, he would be pissed like Alec is. He wipes his eyes with his fist, refusing to let the tears fall down. A second later, his phone rings, and, again, not that it’s surprising, it reads “Magnus”. 

Biting his lip, Alec shakes his head, trying his best to remain strong and not pick up the phone. He doesn’t want to hear Magnus’ voice telling him to come home. He doesn’t think he has the power to deny it by now.

And in that moment he realises that maybe he can’t really handle his alcohol. 

As soon as his phone stops vibrating, it lights up with a text from him. “Just tell me where you are, I know you don’t want to talk to me, but I’m worried, Alexander,” it reads. Alec bites thumb and sighs. “Fuck,” he whispers before he is sending Magnus his location. When he does, he turns his phone off and puts it inside his pocket.

Underhill comes back about ten minutes later with two beers and a hickey. 

He hands Alec the beer and says “sorry it took so long,” and Alec can’t help but let out a sweet small giggle from his lips when he spots the purple spot, soon moving his hand to cover his mouth. “Don’t do that,” Underhill says as he reaches for his hand and moves it away, “it’s beautiful,” he tells him, “you’re beautiful”. Alec takes a second before he finally reacts, pulling away from him and standing up. “What are you doing?” he asks him. Underhill parts his lips, trying to find an explanation. When he’s not able to, he shakes his head and rolls his eyes, “sorry, man,” he says, “sorry, didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable”.

Alec squeezes his eyes, not trusting his words and doubting his intentions. 

“I’m sorry,” he says, but Alec doesn’t even answer, he’s soon walking out of the bar. Behind him, Underhill follows him until they’re both outside. 

He reaches for Alec’s hand but he pulls away. “It won’t happen again,” Underhill reassures him. Alec’s breathing hard, completely uncomfortable with the situation. “I think it’s late, I should probably should go. Magnus must be worried,” he says. “I’m sorry, Alec,” Underhill repeats his words, “I got carried on. I-,” he bites his lip, “I’ve always had a crush on you and sometimes I can’t control myself when I’m around you”.

Alec’s eyes widen even more. “Okay,” he manages to let out, “oh, God,” he blinks repeatedly. “I shouldn’t be here,” he says as he turns to walk away. In a glimpse, Underhill is pulling Alec’s hand, leaning in and planting a kiss on his lips. It doesn’t even last a half a second because Alec is pulling away and pushing him. “What the fuck are you doing, man?” he asks in disbelief, “you can’t just kiss people without their permission,” he continues.

Realising what he just did, Underhill widens his eyes. “I’m sorry,” he starts, “I am so sorry, Alec,” he moves his hand to his forehead, “fuck, I’m so stupid”. Underhill tries to reach for him, but Alec takes two steps back. “Man, back off,” he says. “Alec, I’m sorry-,” he’s about to continue when he’s interrupted by someone pushing his shoulder. 

“What the fuck are you doing?”. It’s Magnus. 

Alec’s eyes widen, “fuck,” he whispers. “What the fuck are you doing, Underhill?” he repeats, pushing his shoulder again. “Leave my boyfriend alone,” he says angrily, “you can’t just kiss compromised people because they are alone,” he yells at him. Magnus stares at him with furrowed eyebrows for a few more seconds before he turns to Alec and says “Alexander, let’s go home,” he says firmly. Alec blinks a couple of times but soon nods, and Magnus wastes no time making a portal for them to go home.

When they arrive, Alec is still confused about the whole situation. His heart is racing really fast and he can’t believe any part of what just happened. Underhill and Magnus and him. He feels like he’s running out of air. Magnus starts yelling and Alec tries to listen, but he can’t focus on anything he’s saying because he feels dizzy and before knows, his vision is turning black and he’s falling to the ground.

The last thing he hears is Magnus screaming his name.

When Alec wakes up, his head hurts. He still feels dizzy, but more relaxed than he was before. He slowly blinks his eyes open as he looks around the room, which he recognises as Magnus’. Slowly moving his hand to his head because of the pain, he starts to shift his position so he will be sitting down, but Magnus stops him. “It’s okay,” Magnus sweet voice says, “take your time, Alexander”. His fingers caress Alec’s arm as if he’s trying to assure him that everything is fine.

“What happened?” Alec mutters under his breath as he sits down, ignoring Magnus’ words. Magnus takes a deep breath, pulling away from Alec and rolling his eyes at him for being so stubborn. “You fainted,” he says as he stands up from the bed. The shadowhunter furrows his eyebrows, trying to recall what happened. Seconds later, he remembers everything and sighs deeply. 

The silence fills the air even though both of them can see the huge elephant in the room. Alec scratches his head and looks down at the bedsheets. He has so much to say but he can’t find to courage to even open his mouth. He feels like his throat is closed and he’s worried that anything he says might worsen the situation. He decides to stay quiet, won’t speak until Magnus does so.

And Magnus does. 

“I was worried about you, Alexander,” Magnus says, licking his lips and sighing. “I thought something bad happened to you when didn’t pick up your phone”. Alec stays quiet, still looking down. He’s afraid the conversation will lead to the end of them. “Alec, you can’t just ignore me,” Magnus furrows his eyebrows, his face showing an expression of pure pain. When the shadowhunter doesn’t say anything else, the warlock walks to the bed and sits down in front of Alec. “So, what? Are you not speaking to me anymore? That’s it?” he presses Alec’s buttons.

Alec clenches his jaw and gulps. “That’s not it,” he lets out. “Then, what is it?” Magnus asks him, “because I thought you were dead. You never ignore my calls, Alexander, not even when we’re fighting,” he points out, shaking his head. “I didn’t-,” Alec says firmly as soon as Magnus’s last word leaves his mouth, “I’ve never felt this way, Magnus,” he says, voice breaking between the words. “I felt betrayed, like this,” he pauses, still not daring to look up, “like this meant so little to you that you’d have to remember your exes to feel happy”. 

As soon as Alec says that, Magnus shakes his head, hand reaching for Alec’s chin and making him look up. “Alec, don’t ever think that I’m not happy,” he says, emphasising the ever. “Before you say anything, I do understand where you’re coming from, how you’re feeling- I understand your pain,” Magnus caresses Alec’s cheek with his thumb. “I understand that this hard to get and that it sounds like something that it definitely isn’t,” he continues, “but, please, understand I have lived for over three hundred years and I don’t want to be the person who is okay with forgetting things”. 

Alec looks away, he can’t accept it, not even if he tries. He can’t understand him and the fact that Magnus is still insisting on it and not just apologising, is what hurts him the most. “Alec, those memories, they’re not just people, okay? They’re times. They’re different moments of my life that involve friends, places that I visited and things that I lived,” he tells him, his voice sounding more and more in pain, like he’s tired of trying to convince Alec of something he will never understand. “Alec, I don’t need to remember what I lived with other people, because I have you and it’s enough,” he pauses, “but I can’t bring myself to forget what I’ve been through, I’m sorry. I can’t,” he whispers the last part.

Magnus feels like crying, like this is it for them. He understand Alec’s pain, but he doesn’t know any other way to explain to him the importance of that box. Like he said, it’s not about the boyfriends and girlfriends of the past, it’s about when he out to dance jazz in New Jersey, the first time he ate croissants in Paris, the first time he watched a show in Germany. It’s about moments he doesn’t want to forget, not about the people he was with.

“I felt jealous,” Alec whispers, “I felt jealous and I thought that I wasn’t making you happy because you would always check that box, every morning. It hurt me when I found out what those memories were and all I could think was that maybe the box wasn’t just it”. He takes a deep breath and sighs. Alec feels a tears slowly slipping down his left cheek, but he ignores it. “Maybe- maybe you were also thinking of someone else while I was kissing you- while we were making love,” his voice breaks. 

“Alexander,” Magnus says hurriedly. “This is crazy,” he says, shaking his head. “Alexander,” he repeats as he reaches for Alec’s hands and moves so he’s sitting as close as he can to him. “You are the one I think when we’re making love. You are the one I think when I’m kissing,” he tells him, “and you are the one who makes me the happiest man on earth and I don’t need anyone other than you”. Alec slowly looks up at him, his face now all wet with tears. “Alexander, you’re the love of my life, not just a memory,” he says firmly.

After a minute quiet, Alec clenches his jaw and looks deep into Magnus eyes. “Fucking prove it,” he mutters under his breath.

Before they both know, Magnus is leaning in and closing the space between them. The kiss in rapid and violent, like they’re in a hurry to feel each other’s skin. Body to body, as one. Alec pulls Magnus into his lap, pulling his hair and moving to his neck, sucking on it until it’s purple and pulls out a moan from Magnus. When Alec pulls away and goes back to kissing him on the lips, Magnus whispers between kisses “fuck me”.

And Alec. Well, Alec can’t breathe. His cock is hard inside his pants and Magnus is shamelessly grinding onto it. “Fuck me, fuck me, Alexander,” he repeats like a mantra. Alec moans heavily and wraps his right arm around Magnus, turning them around and throwing him on the bed. “I will,” he whispers into his ear. The warlock’s hands reach for Alec’s pants and start undoing his belt. “Take it off,” he mumbles. When Alec finally gets rid of his pants and is completely naked, he starts undoing Magnus’ clothes. 

Normally, Alec would take his time to admire his boyfriend, but in this moment, he just wants to fuck and claim him. Prove him that no one else can make him feel this good. Once they’re both naked and Alec has grabbed the lube, he slowly rubs it at Magnus’ entrance. “Don’t bother,” the warlock says once Alec starts sliding his finger inside him. “You fucked me yesterday, I don’t need it,” Magnus tells him. 

Alec’s eyes move up, looking straight into Magnus’ eyes. “You’re mine, Magnus,” he says firmly. “You’re mine and no one else will fuck you like I do,” he says as he moves Magnus’ legs up so they’re over his shoulder. He rubs his cock against the warlock’s entrance and slowly slides in. Alec can’t look anywhere else other than at Magnus’ face and the way his eyes roll as the pleasure hits him. Once it’s all in, Alec stays still, because he may want to fuck him so hard he feels it for days, but he still doesn’t want to hurt Magnus.

In a bad way, that is.

Once Magnus is comfortable, he whispers “please,” and Alec complies. He fucks him like he owns him, like no one else will ever be able to, if it depends on him. “Harder,” Magnus tells him and Alec does as told. While he’s fucking him, Magnus’ eyes never shift away from Alec’s, like he’s trying to proving a point. Like he’s trying to prove him that he doesn’t have to think about anyone else because Alec is enough. Goddamn, Alec is more than enough.

“You’re mine, Magnus,” Alec says between thrusts. “You’re mine and you’ll always be,” his hands move from his hips to hold Magnus’ over his head. “Say it. Say that you’re mine,” he tells him. “I’m yours,” he mutters between moans, “fuck-,” he says when Alec starts fucking him harder, hitting that same spot over and over again. “I’m yours,” he moans, eyes rolling to the back of his head as he comes. For Alec, the scene is overwhelming, and feeling Magnus tightening around him is what sends him over the edge. “Fuck, Magnus,” he moans.

Quietly, they hold each other. They’re both still breathing heavily minutes later when Magnus speaks up. “Hey, Alexander,” he says and Alec supports him elbow on the bed and looks down at Magnus. “Huh?” He asks. “I told you sex always fix things with us,” he says, smirking at him. Alec hits him lightly in the chest. “You’re an asshole,” he shakes his head as he says it, not stopping the smirk from forming in the corner of his lips.

Magnus reaches for Alec’s face and caresses it with his thumb. “You’re it, Alec,” he says, “you’re the one for me and I don’t ever want you to doubt that”. Alec smiles warmly at him, “I love you, Magnus,” he tells him, “more than anything and anyone”.

“You’re always gonna be it, Alexander," Magnus smiles, "you're always gonna be it".


End file.
